


Curse

by Bakeneko37



Category: VIXX
Genre: Angst, Hanahaki Disease, M/M, SPOILER: NO ONE DIES, Unrequited Love
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-08
Updated: 2017-09-08
Packaged: 2018-12-25 07:01:08
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,815
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12030639
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bakeneko37/pseuds/Bakeneko37
Summary: It shouldn't be called Hanakai disease, Taekwoon considered this was a curse, a painful curse.





	Curse

**Author's Note:**

> As a major spoiler I can say no one dies-  
> Sorry for all the suffering you're going to witness, reach the end!

Flowers are supposed to be beautiful, are supposed to bring happiness and joy to the one receiving it.

Taekwoon couldn’t see any of this when they came out of his mouth almost all the time.

“Calm down, I got you…” He heard Hakyeon’s voice saying with that concerned tone he had, the one that made Taekwoon’s heart aches with guilt.

“I’m fine…” He muttered, still panting and struggling to catch his breath, looking away from the bag filled with those red rose petals “I’m fine.”

“You’re not fine and you know it.” Hakyeon said with a firm tone, shaking his head.  

True, he wasn’t okay and was never going to be till the day he finally succumbed to this illness, this curse. People called it the Hanahaki disease, but for Taekwoon it had never really been a disease, it was a curse that was eating his life piece by piece, taking great liking in hurting his throat, as if it knew that was what he needed more since he was one of the main vocalists.

“I don’t need to hear it, Hakyeon.”

“Of course you don’t.”

Even thought it had been years since that day, Taekwoon could clearly remember the day he discovered he was in love with Wonsik. It had been the same day they won their very first award with Voodoo Doll, all the members were ecstatic and happy about it and it wasn’t really a surprise they found themselves drinking and having their own celebrations when they were back in the dorm, Taekwoon, been the quiet and kind of solitary member he is, was trying to keep a calm conversation with an hyperactive Hongbin that kept jumping and cheering everyone for their award thanks to a couple of extra shots he had while celebrating when Wonsik had started laughing and running around the room because he received a message from his sister congratulating him and the rest of members for what they achieved that day.

The moment was a normal Wonsik thing, even the fans knew that rapper Ravi and normal Wonsik were almost two different kind of persons and that the dominant personality he showed on stage was different to the ball of fluff he could be around them, it didn’t really have anything special, but Taekwoon suddenly realised he _liked_ too much the way he was behaving and couldn’t look away from his smiling face, not even if he wanted.

_Taekwoon hyung likes seeing Wonsikie!_ Hongbin half whispered half yelled in Taekwoon’s ear while giggling, pushing him to the side, only to pull him back by the arm.

In that moment he only managed to smack him in the head for saying such things before moving away and going to sit in the other sofa, away from him and from his words hammering his brain while he glanced at Wonsik that was currently showing Jaehwan the message.

Taekwoon’s relationships with each member was different, Hakyeon was his best friend thanks to all the years they have spent together, although there were times were he found himself escaping from him, he tended to run back to him when he needed a moment to himself, knowing the other was like a safe house when things were serious. Jaehwan was the literal definition of his opposite, loud and hyperactive, he sometimes struggled to be around the silent and unresponsive person he was, still, they were friends and they both knew they could trust each other whenever they needed it. Hongbin was actually the kind of person that was easy to get close to, although he had a sassy and savage personality, Taekwoon found it was really easy to spend time with him…

His relationship with Wonsik was, in a lot of senses, the most confusing yet greatest relationship he had among the five of them. He drove him mad a lot of times and received the same aggressive response all the others got when he did things where he didn’t really know how to react, but unlike the others, he found himself getting used to them faster. He was really confused when that happened, he always thought it was going to be easier for him to be closer to Hakyeon for their past, but in the end was Wonsik and he couldn’t tell why.

Their relationship continued developing as weeks and months passed, Taekwoon found himself getting more and more comfortable around everyone and the other to the point where he, sometimes, liked fooling around with him, forgetting about his insecurities and every bad thing he sometimes thought of himself in order to enjoy the moment.

Wonsik became a base for it, the rapper was always present in those moments and sometimes helped to make him feel more confident about what he was doing, Taekwoon smiled and even laughed when he was with him and things were doing great.

Then VIXX LR came.

One morning their managers called only the two of them to a meeting with the CEO of their company, there they were told they had plans of forming a subunit of the main group where it was only the two of them, the great rap-ballad combination they were sure people would love to hear.

The idea sounded great for him and the look in Wonsik’s eyes told him the other thought the same, he could see and feel his excitement leaving his body, the feeling only getting stronger every time they got together to work on a song.

One night Taekwoon found himself feeling something interesting inside his chest, he could feel the affection for the other was really strong and he found himself scared of damaging their relationship or doing something that turned things awkward. From there, he worked hard to convince himself that the things he was feeling didn’t have anything to do with falling in love with him and were just the close brotherly moments they all shared together the responsible.

His whole effort wasn’t enough when, one night, the first bunch of red petals came out of his mouth right in the middle of his’ and Hakyeon’s room.

Hakyeon had almost screamed at the sight of his best friend coughing and throwing up a mass of red things that for a moment looked like blood, thankfully he didn’t and he just ran to his aid and rubbed his back in a soothing manner, wanting to help him relax so he stopped those painful-looking convulsions.

“We need to take you to the doctor.”

Were the first words he heard from Hakyeon when he managed to calm down a little, but he rejected the idea as soon as he processed it “I-I won’t, leave me alone.”

Hakyeon did so, but not because he was giving up on him, but because he knew the realisation of what just happened was settling in his brain and he could see the tears starting to roll down his cheeks. As silently as he could, he walked out of the room and went to distract himself with a book.

The fact that Taekwoon was throwing up flowers was because he fell in love with Wonsik and Wonsik didn’t love him back.

From that day, his life became a painful struggle that sometimes was too much for him. Hakyeon was the only person that knew what was happening to him and the singer made him promise he wasn’t going to say a word to anyone else, it was unfair, but he wasn’t willing to risk the band’s future when they were doing well and of course, he wasn’t willing to let go of Wonsik.

“Roses remind me of him, the red ones only” Hakyeon sighed while listening to him without interrupting “He’s delicate and enchanting, but can also hurt if you don’t know how to handle him.”

“Yes, he defended himself and us in that song with burning passion.” He nodded, feeling his own heart tightening in his chest for how sad everything was “Taekwoon, you should talk to him.”

“I won’t, having this is a solid proof that he doesn’t love me or men in any sense, I won’t be hurting him, won’t accept a forced love.”

The only thing Hakyeon could do was run to his side when another violent fit attacked the singer’s body and made him throw up so many petals he was sure they could cover their entire room.

 “Are you alright, hyung?” Sanghyuk asked when Taekwoon suddenly moved away from them while they were practicing and was just leaning over the wall, covering his mouth with his hand and struggling to hold back the petals climbing up his throat.

“He’s old, he gets tired more easily” Hongbin commented with a laugh that made Jaehwan and Wonsik chuckle “You catch up your breath, hyung, we got this.”

Taekwoon wished he could do something that made them less suspicious, but the only thing he could do was storm out of the room and get to the bathroom were he locked himself up and doubled over the toilet, throwing up so many bloody petals he swore they looked bigger.

“Is hyung sick or something?” Hakyeon almost jumped when it was Wonsik’s voice the one that reached his ears.

_Yes! He’s dying because of this illness!_ He wanted to scream, but he just shook his head and patted his back “He’s tired, let him rest.”

It was about after three months that Taekwoon’s body started to reveal more clearly just how sick he was, it started to become harder for both of them to hide the obvious black bags under his eyes, the pale and obviously sick looking colour his skin had and just how weak his voice sounded some times.

The curse had worsened too, Taekwoon’s coughing attacks were longer and the amount of petals he threw up looked like they belonged to a dozen roses.  If what Hakyeon read was true, the flower was growing bigger and it was starting to block parts of his respiratory system, if it wasn’t removed or cured, he was going to die.

“It isn’t fair, you can’t do this to us” Hakyeon was reaching his breaking point by the end of the fourth month, the picture of Taekwoon lying on his bed with a bunch of petals in his bed and the floor next to it, looking so sick and weak, not even having he strength to keep his eyes open, breathing so heavily it sounded scary.

“I’m not doing it to you…”

“You are! What am I supposed to do? Just see my friend dying because he wants to? You can’t do this to me, to them, to him!”

Taekwoon whimpered softly, the intensity of his voice almost making his head explode. He knew what he meant, but how could you simply forget the person you love so deeply? Forgetting everything sounded as painful as dying for lack of oxygen.

“Hakyeon I-“

He stopped when they heard a faint knock on the door, Hakyeon’s went wide while he looked back at it; they tough they were alone, they were supposed to be away, who was here? Shaking his head, he went to the door and taking a deep breath, he opened it, keeping it as closed as he could so they didn’t see Taekwoon’s weak body “Hongbin, what are you doing here?”

“I, well, I came back earlier than expected” He started, clearing his throat, looking really weary about something “We have been together for a long time, what’s wrong with Leo hyung?”

Hakyeon bit his lip, looking away from his eyes and closing them for a second, he hated lying to them, they meant as much as Taekwoon and it hurt him a lot to be stuck in this position “He’s tired, have already told you.”

“That’s not-“

Hongbin stopped midsentence when a series of violent coughs echoed inside the room, the eyes of the younger lit up with worry as their continued and Hakyeon couldn’t do anything about it before he ran to Taekwoon’s side, holding him up so he didn’t chocked on the petals.

“This…” Hongbin of course took the chance to enter, moving directly to his bed, wide eyes looking at the amount of petals on the floor and the ones coming out of his hyung’s mouth “Hyung why you didn’t tell us?”

Taekwoon cursed internally when he recognised the other’s figure inside the room, he didn’t want anyone else to find out, it was unnecessary and the chances of Wonsik knowing were higher.

“You didn’t need to… Don’t say anything, Hongbin.” He said, closing his eyes once more.

Yes, Hongbin felt hurt and betrayed, he always thought they were close enough to share this kind of things, what if he died and they didn’t know why? It was unfair, but the reason hit him as hard as a train and he gasped when a petal came from Taekwoon’s lips.

“It’s Wonsik right?” He whispered, looking at Hakyeon who could only nod.

“H-How?” Taekwoon asked, panicking since he felt it was too obvious.

“Red, that freaking hair suits him so well” He muttered, sighing and sitting down slowly “Hyung, talk to him, maybe…”

“I won’t do it… I don’t want a forced love.”

“You prefer dying then? Leaving all of us alone?”

He had a point, again, it was unfair for the others and he felt that prick of pain inside his heart, of guilt.

“We will support you, please try it, if not…we will go to the doctor.”

He hated it, hated that everything was turning up like this, but now that dead was coming closer to him, he had to admit he was scared.

⩫⩫⩫

“Wonsik I…”

“Hyung, are you okay? You don’t look good.” He could hear the concern filling Wonsik’s words while he looked at his bony form in front of him.

“Listen to me, Wonsik” He sighed, looking up at him to meet those worried eyes that were so beautiful to him. It didn’t matter those supposed fans said Ravi was ugly, Wonsik and Ravi were beautiful in his eyes “I… I feel something for you.”

He instantly saw confusion filling those eyes that a couple of seconds ago were full of worry “Like… what?”

Wonsik’s words hurt even though he hadn’t said anything directly “I think you know” He sighed, placing his hand on his chest when he felt another fit coming for the proximity “I like you.”

“Hyung I… I don’t know, I’m so sorry.”

Taekwoon’s world came down faster than the time it took Wonsik to get out of the room; the pain immediately activating his curse.

Hongbin and Hakyeon came running to the room when they saw the rapper running past them with a distressed look, their hearts dropping at the realisation of what had happened. They found Taekwoon curled up in a ball in the middle of a pool of blood like petals, body still twitching and convulsing now and then for how strong the attack had been.

⩫⩫⩫

Taekwoon couldn’t resist any more after a week passed from that day, right in the middle of a rehearsal for their upcoming concert, he collapsed in front of six pair of wide eyes that immediately jumped into action at seeing him pass out.

Hakyeon was the one who talked to the manager and the doctor, the other four weren’t allowed to go in while he discussed things; they were lead to a room where the anxiousness and fear were the dominating feelings.

Hongbin glanced at Wonsik, the rapper seemed close to tears and the picture really broke his heart, Taekwoon didn’t say anything about the _curse_ to him so he didn’t really know the cause of his state, he was just scared for not knowing what was happening, of losing Taekwoon.

“He’s going to be okay, you know he’s strong” Sanghyuk said, patting Wonsik’s tight and trying to reassure him “Surely he hadn’t been eating well, we’re so blaming N hyung for it, we will feed him a lot!”

Wonsik let out a kind of strangled chuckle, shaking his head and pressing his hands to his eyes, trying hard not to cry although some tears had leaked out.

Hongbin knew they were going to find out the truth and he was scared of their reaction, he could only hope everything was for the best.

Hakyeon came into the room after an hour or so with a tired expression and with a few traces of tears that had rolled down and he had wiped away before entering the room, he stayed in silent for a couple of seconds before he looked up and talked “I, Taekwoon will go into surgery.”

“Surgery?! What happened?!” Jaehwan asked, panic quickly filling his soothing voice.

“He has… the Hanahaki disease” He said, letting out the air slowly “They will be removing the infection.”

“The unrequited love illness?” Sanghyuk asked, standing up to look at him “I- For how long?”

“Fourth months…” He sighed, crossing his arms.

“Why he never told us...”

“You need to understand him, Hyuk, I think you can really understand it.”

“Who is he in love with…? Maybe the surgery it’s not the only solution.”

Hongbin’s eyes moved again to Wonsik, the tears were rolling freely down his cheeks in that moment and he could see his hands were starting to tremble, he knew he understood what was happening and he had to admit that was a horrible way of finding out.

“It is, Sanghyuk, his body can’t take it anymore” Hakyeon’s voice came out in a kind of shaky whisper while his eyes closed “They’re preparing him right now.”

Before anyone could understand what was happening, Wonsik stood up and ran out of the room. He was crying and he didn’t care the eyeliner was running down with the tears, his perfect idol appearance was the last thing he cared about in this moment.

He turned and pushed the door to the room he had seen the doctor rolling Taekwoon in open, startling the doctor and nurses that were surrounding his hyung.

“Sir you can’t-“

“Please don’t do it, hyung, please don’t do it!” He sobbed, reaching to hold his hand tightly between his own, wincing when he spotted a bunch of red petals between the sheets.

“Wonsik…” Taekwoon was surprised when he heard his voice and managed to open his eyes to look at him, seeing the tears marking that beautiful face of his “What are you doing?”

“Don’t do it, don’t forget me… I was scared, so scared” He whispered, squirming to get away from the doctor and nurse hold that were trying to take him out for obvious reasons.

“D-Don’t suffer, things will be fine” He said, squeezing his hand weakly and shaking his head.

“Please give me a chance… I can, I can show you something.”

“Wonsik I won’t force you.”

“Trust me hyung, please.” The desperation in his voice made his heart ache and although he felt his body couldn’t take it anymore, he found himself clutching his hand tightly before nodding weakly.

“You know I do…”

⩫⩫⩫

It takes Taekwoon a full week to get out of hospital and even when he does, he needs to be taken out in a wheelchair because he’s still too weak to walk by his own.

Wonsik is always there.

The petals still rose from his throat and came out of his mouth with violence quiet often, but Taekwoon’s faith lies in the fact that it is Wonsik the one rubbing his back and holding the bag for him to throw up in there and not make a mess.

Hakyeon, Hongbin, Sanghyuk and Jaehwan take care of him a lot too, there are days were each one take turns to take care of his weak state despite Wonsik being in the room in every single moment.

“Why roses?” Wonsik asked one day while he picked up the petals that were sticking to Taekwoon’s lips.

“Because you’re like one.” It’s the only answer he gave, but Wonsik doesn’t insist and he looks kind of happy with it.

It’s almost imperceptible for Wonsik, but Hakyeon quickly realises the amount of petals he’s throwing up is way less than what it used to be. The coughing fits are also less violent and he finally sees colour seems to be going back to his skin.

None of them mentions anything, but they can’t stop their smiles from breaking into their faces at realising he cure it’s arriving.

“Why you rejected me?”

Wonsik tensed noticeably when Taekwoon’s question interrupts his slow movements he’s making to feed him the soup Jaehwan brought, he lick his lips nervously while placing the bowl in the night table Taekwoon has.

“I was scared, terrified for everything” He starts, sighing softly “I know they say we’re free to date with whoever we want, but falling in love with a man…I couldn’t.”

“You don’t really love me, right?” He dares to question, as much as breathing kind of normally and not throwing up so violently it’s the best thing, he doesn’t want to force him to continue something he doesn’t want.

“I do… Hyung, I tried to push them away because I wasn’t sure you felt the same and I didn’t know how to deal with it” He sighed “I didn’t know I was causing you so much pain and, literally, killing you.”

“But you did… in the end you came.”

“I did and I’m happy I stopped being a coward, to be honest.”

“I’m happy about that too.”

“…You were supposed to say I’m not a coward, hyung.”

“But you were.”

The coughing started to subside at one point, Taekwoon regained the ability of breathing normally as time passed by, the petals that came from his mouth felt somehow smaller and the aching pain in his chest was more bearable.

“I don’t feel something in my throat anymore…”

Wonsik smiled when he heard Taekwoon’s words, his arms reaching for the other to hug him tightly “You’re cured.”

“How do you know? It could be temporal” He whispered, smiling like an idiot and loving the feeling of being in his arms.

“Because I can do this now” He muttered, pulling back just enough to look into his eyes “I love you, hyung.”

Taekwoon felt his face turning completely read with those simple words and although he had come to not like the colour that much, he just smiled and hid his face in his neck, sighing softly.

There were times where he could see Wonsik had his doubts about how to behave and what to do when they weren’t alone, flustered about what to say when the others annoyed him by saying he almost killed Taekwoon, but in general, he could see he was doing his best and wasn’t being forced.

The Hanahaki cursed made him suffer a lot, but in the end it was he the one who laughed more.

 


End file.
